Tuesday, January 03, 2006

The financial reality of freelancing

Unsurprisingly, money is the biggest issue that I have had to face as a freelancer. Although I do have the advantage of not having to be the primary breadwinner, I still find that my income - or lack thereof - bothers me. Mostly I feel guilty because Michael has to cover so many of the bills himself. He insists that he doesn't mind, but nonetheless, I feel like I need to resume paying my own way as soon as possible. Luckily, I do have babysitting and other outside work as a supplement, which should pick up again now that the holidays are over.

Besides not being able to pay my full share of the bills, I've also had difficulties with buying for pleasure. This issue is two-pronged. One one hand, I've always felt that in a relationship, women who make less or opt to be a homemaker shouldn't have to ask before buying anything for themselves. On the other hand, if I buy anything for myself I end up feeling guilty, as that is money that could have gone toward my share of the bills. Michael hasn't seemed to mind when I spend money on my hobbies, but I still feel that I need to be more cautious about spending money until I start generating more of an income.

Of course, I have hopes that the next month or two will see increases in work and income for me. And I am aggressively seeking to make my hopes realized.

Speaking of which, I need to get back to my to-do list...

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