Panama makes some of the cutest sounds. One of my favorites is the deep nicker he uses when he is really excited about the prospect of getting fed.

If you turn up the sound on this video, you should be able to hear it, right after I ask (from out of sight of the camera) whether he wants some hay. The nicker is at about 16 seconds, if that helps at all:



There's also a little story about why I keep saying "Back," when I enter the stall. Soon after he switched to this barn, I found out he was virtually running over anyone who came into his stall with hay or grain, in his half-crazed attempt to get at it. Ever since, I've been giving him handfuls of hay when I'm there to teach him to step back and wait patiently for me to put it in his feeder.

There was a week or two when every time I entered his stall with the hay, I had to turn in circles and elbow him a lot in order to keep him from mauling me to get to the hay. As you can see, though, he now responds to the "Back" command and follows me quite respectfully to his feeder.

It's always such a good feeling to see the results of even minor training efforts!

Labels: my horse Panama

I haven't posted about Panama in a while, so I thought it was time I did so. And I have the perfect story for my post, too!

On Saturday, my mom and I went to the stables to visit Panama in the late afternoon or early evening. The horses are turned out every day, but are usually returned to their stalls around mid-afternoon. So when we arrived, the horses were all "put away" for the night.

The weather is warming up considerably these days, and when we arrived Panama was lying down in his run, which faces west. He was facing into the sun, obviously very warm and relaxed. He didn't get up to greet me, so my mom and I let ourselves into the stall and walked over to him.

Panama was lying with his neck upright and his legs tucked up to one side, so I knelt beside his head. I started petting him and talking to him, and he leaned his head into me and "snuggled." It was so cute!

After a little while I went around his head and crouched on the other side. Before long he rolled all the way onto his side and laid with his head in the dirt and his legs stretched straight out. Where I was kneeling, I totally felt like he was a big dog that had just rolled over to have its belly rubbed!

I laughed and rubbed his belly — which is usually pretty ticklish, at least when I'm grooming him — and he half-closed his eyes and twitched his lips. It was obvious that he enjoyed it very much. I knelt there for a little while and alternated rubbing his belly with stroking his neck and shoulder.

Eventually, he sat up again. "Do you want some treats?" I asked, and his ears perked up. (He definitely knows that question!) He got up and shook off (again, just like a dog!), and I took him out to the cross ties to groom him.

I wish I had had my camera on me so that I could show you pictures of my horse lying there in his run while I petted him. Heck, I wish I'd had it so that I could see those pictures! It was a wonderful bonding moment with my horse, and definitely a moment worth remembering.

Labels: my horse Panama

Today, for the first time in my life, I fell off a horse.

I'm not a terribly experienced rider; a family friend taught me to ride about 15 years ago, but I never took professional lessons, and it turns out there are some things — rather important things — our friend didn't teach me.

In any case, Panama freaked out and bolted today when I was riding him. My first response was to grab onto the pommel, which my trainer said tends to make them only run faster. Then I tried a one-rein stop, but a little too late — I was already starting to fall, and when Panama broke free of that and started running back to the barn (we were in the pasture behind it) I fell off.

Luckily we still have a lot of snow on the ground, so I had a relatively soft landing. Even so, falling off a horse wasn't as bad as I had expected. I'm actually relieved that I fell off today, because now I won't dread it anymore.

Of course, I made sure I rode Panama again before the end of the training session. For one thing, I didn't want him to think he could get away with bolting on me, and for another, I didn't want to allow myself to develop a fear of it.

Writing about falling off a horse, and getting back up on again, made me think of my current situation with work. I've worked through most of the holidays, but with a relatively light load — in other words, only doing what I had to do, whether for deadlines or income. However, today is back to business as usual: Michael is back at work, and won't be allowed to take any time off in January. Meanwhile, I need to get back up to speed if I want to be able to make my fourth estimated tax payment on January 15th.

Getting back to work after the holidays is always difficult, but I think it's also important to do so. Just like falling off a real horse, if you don't get back on again quickly, you start dreading it and putting it off. And since self-motivation and self-regulation are vital qualities for freelancers, we simply can't afford not to get back up on that horse again.

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama

For years, horseback riders' rights to trail ride have been slowly chipped away. Many wonderful horse trails have been closed — at least to the horses.

In response, a new bill, S. 2283, has been introduced to protect our "right to ride." I urge you to read the bill, spread the word, and write to your senators and representatives. Even if you do not ride yourself, no one can deny that horseback riding is a historical tradition in our country, and an important pastime for many Americans.

Labels: my horse Panama, news

Just like last year, our white Christmas made national headlines.

The article comments that by mid-morning we had already gotten as much snow as had been predicted for the entire day. Actually, I'd say we surpassed the original forecast by mid-morning: As of yesterday, they'd still been predicting 2 to 4 inches of snow. This morning they decided it would be more like 4 to 8 inches, but by mid-morning we'd already gotten that.

It didn't stop snowing until mid or late afternoon.

Michael and I have taken it easy today — we're watching movies, and for dinner we'll have the sweet potato soup we were intending to take to my sister's house. Tomorrow we'll try to make it to the stables to see Panama, and to my parents' house to visit them. (My sister and her boyfriend are taking his mother skiing tomorrow.)

I haven't been working the last couple of days, but I've used the time to get caught up on my blogs. It's been nice to do some writing that is entirely for my own pleasure.

How have you spent your Christmas?

Labels: family, holidays, Michael, my horse Panama, news

Last year, we had two blizzards this time of year: one a few days before Christmas, and another just a week later. The result was that we had an extra-long vacation around Christmas and New Year's, but that we were also snowed in for several days each time.

Unbelieveably, I think our snowstorm this year might have trumped last year's. Although we are technically getting less snow, getting it on Christmas Day has impacted our Christmas plans much more than last year's blizzard did: We're pretty much snowed in, which means we won't be going to my sister's house for Christmas dinner as planned.

I'm also disappointed that we won't be able to go to the stables today — I really wanted to visit my horse on Christmas. I even have a present for him, but I guess it'll have to wait until tomorrow.

Labels: family, holidays, my horse Panama

I hope you are all spending time with your loved ones and not on the computer, but if you fall into the latter group, here are some pictures to cheer you up.

This was the picture on my Christmas cards this year:



The inside read, "Next year it'll be a one-horse open sleigh."

The Santa hat photo shoot was quite an experience. In this picture, Panama looks like he's had too much egg nog:



Here are some other Santa hat photos. Panama was actually pretty tolerant of the whole thing: Once he realized I really did want him to keep the hat on his head, he just looked at me like, "Okay... What now?"





Merry Christmas, everyone!

Labels: holidays, my horse Panama

Panama moved to his new home today. Overall, he handled it well: He was nervous at first, but by the time he'd been there a few hours, he acted almost as though he'd always been there.

My trainer arrived at the stables early this morning, thinking she would have a hard time turning the truck and trailer around in the drive. As it turned out, she didn't at all, and we were able to get Panama loaded up much earlier than we had expected.

We arrived at the new place at about 10 o'clock this morning, and I didn't leave until 3 this afternoon. I watched Panama progress from being really nervous about the place, to settling in and making friends with the other horses. I was worried originally about turning him out with the other horses too soon, but after a little while I realized he seemed to want to go out into the pasture with them.

The cutest thing was how Panama was so aware of where I was... or wasn't. At first, we had him turned out with a flake of hay to snack on. He was pretty focused on eating, but if I walked away from the fence to go inside the barn or to my car, he'd come to the fence and start looking for me. He clearly felt more secure when I was nearby.

As he started becoming more comfortable in his new surroundings, he also became much more vocal about wanting me close. Even when he was in the pasture with the other horses, if I disappeared for too long he'd start whinnying for me. I know his voice and can easily pick it out from the other horses, just as he no doubt knows mine. It makes me giddy knowing we have that connection.

Anyway, the day was a complete success. Panama already seems happier in the new place than he was at the old stables — it was a joy to see him running and bucking across the big pasture, socializing with the other horses, and checking out the various nooks and crannies of the new place.

Labels: my horse Panama

Since we'll be moving Panama to a new stables very soon, yesterday my trainer and I spent our session practicing trailer loading.

For those of you who don't remember the full story of Panama's rescue, at 11 months old he was in a trailer accident that resulted in his mother's euthanization. Soon afterward, Michael paid the vet bill and we assumed ownership of Panama.

Perhaps as a result of the injuries Panama sustained in the trailer accident, he has had some issues with trailers ever since. He did have two uneventful trailer rides after the accident — back and forth to the vet's place — but they were very short and occurred in the wake of tragedy, so I'm sure he associated even the good trailer experiences with major life changes (i.e. losing his mother and leaving his first home for strange and scary experiences).

It was when Panama was brought to Denver from the in-laws' rural pasture that his trailer issues really became apparent. The truck that brought him out here was a semi, so not only did Panama had to load up into a loud and scary trailer-like vehicle, but he also had to go up a ramp first. I wasn't there for this part, but the in-laws told us he was panicked and rearing, and even once broke loose and ran through a wire fence in an effort to get back to the pasture.

With all of this in mind, my trainer and I decided we had better get Panama comfortable with the entire process before the actual day. Last week, I started walking him around the outer yard, where he'd never been before and where the owner keeps large pieces of equipment, such as a broken old tractor and unused trailers. Panama was quite spooky about that the first time, and by the third time had started planting his feet in downright refusal to go out there.

Yesterday my trainer and I used the stable owner's two-horse trailer to practice loading up. It took about a half an hour to get Panama into the trailer at all, and I had to actually pick up a front foot and put it in the trailer the first few times. However, by the end of the hour my trainer had him loading up, even if he was still a little nervous about it.

Having already practiced loading up should help considerably on moving day. I am getting very excited about moving! The new place should be practically a dream come true for me and Panama — daily turnout, good hay, and a friendly atmosphere for him, and full care and peace of mind for me. Hooray!

Labels: my horse Panama

This ought to demonstrate how un-Christmas-like the season has been for us so far: Michael and I only just started our Christmas shopping today.

I don't want anyone to peek and find out what they're getting, so I'm not going to list the gifts here. But I will say that I think everyone will love their gifts.

In general, though, Michael and I don't have as much to work with as usual right now. My reduced work hours and our decision to move Panama to a more expensive (albeit more convenient) facility, combined with a few other factors, has made money a little tight lately. It's mainly bad timing, as I expect to be able to work longer days again two or three days out of the week once we get Panama moved, but it still sucks to be nearly broke around Christmas.

Besides the money issue, Michael's job has also been considerably more stressful lately. Unlike my work, though, a lot of stress at his job isn't balanced with a higher income. (Usually, when I'm stressed it's because I'm working a lot, which in turn means I'm earning more.) Poor Michael has said that it hasn't felt like the holidays at all — and I suppose it really hasn't.

It's starting to feel more like Christmas, though. We took the picture for our Christmas cards last weekend. The cards came a couple of days ago, and I'll have them all ready to send out on Monday. (I'm thrilled with the cards, by the way. I'll post pictures from the photo shoot on Christmas Day.)

Michael also put the Christmas tree up tonight while I was working, which should help a lot. However, getting ready for Christmas this late means that before we know it, it'll all be over. I hate doing it this way, but there's just no way around it: We're having a very harried Christmas.

How is your holiday season shaping up?

Labels: holidays, Michael, my horse Panama

I've decided to move Panama from the stables he is at now. There are many reasons for this, but they fall into two basic categories:

I don't feel he is safe and well cared for where he's at.

The owner is very lackadaisical about horse care and the upkeep of the facilities. Some of these are minor problems, some are more serious:

* Ongoing problems with mold in the hay, probably having to do with the fact that he stores some of it outside with only a tarp as protection from the elements...

* Infrequent breaking of the ice in their water troughs during cold weather — once I had to give a horse water because hers was frozen all the way through, even though the owner had already been out there that morning...

* Infrequent manure removal — there is a HUGE manure pile in the yard, and as many as four wheelbarrows frequently sit in the yard with full loads of manure...

* Lack of attention to the horses' needs or condition — one horse is so skinny her sides cave in behind her ribs; another boarder told me about a horse who got sick, stopped eating, and died over a period of several days, and the stable owner never noticed!

* Infrequent (two or three times a week at best) stall cleanings, even though he calls his facility "full care" — sometimes it's so bad that the horses are all standing in six inches of manure, and he actually told me once that he doesn't think they care!

* Poor maintenance in and around the barn — for example, once he pointed out to me a repair that needed done in one of the stalls, laughed about it, and said it was "an accident waiting to happen." Uh, whose responsibility does he think that is?

I can get real full care for less than $100 extra each month.

My visits to the stables are taking more and more time out of my days. I'm basically taking care of everything the stable owner should be: cleaning my horse's stall, turning him out, cleaning his water trough and filling it, even giving the other horses water! I really need to be able to work more hours, and I'm never going to be able to do that if Panama stays where he is.

I started looking at other facilities, and realized that there are quite a few that offer real full care — i.e. daily stall cleaning, daily turnout, etc. — for only about $100 more each month. I quickly found a place that I like — a place that actually treats it like both a business and a moral responsibility to provide good care for the horses. They get high quality hay there, clean water, daily turnout, and their stalls are cleaned daily. The horses even look and act happier than the ones where I am now.

I've given my notice at my current place, and just need to decide how much of an overlap I can afford to pay for — the sooner I can get Panama moved, the better!

Labels: my horse Panama

Deb Ng posted today about her goals for 2008. In her post, she mentioned that she met her goal of increasing her income by $10,000 in 2007.

Unfortunately, I haven't been as successful in my goals for 2007. Here they were:

1. To revise my NaNoWriMo novel and get it ready for submitting

2. To submit my NaNoWriMo novel to at least one publisher during 2007

3. To start work on my next novel

4. To double my freelance income in 2007

The only one of these goals that I have achieved is number 3, starting work on my next novel — if you consider a detailed outline to be "starting work."

Although I didn't double my income in 2007, by the end of the year I estimate I will have succeeded in increasing it by 50 percent. I am disappointed that I can't say "I did it!" — but I guess it's not a bad achievement, particularly for my second year of full-time freelancing.

However, I also somewhat achieved this goal in another way. In my post, I commented that part of the reason for this goal was so that I could afford to stable my horse in town. While I didn't manage to double my income, I did still manage to bring Panama out here!

I haven't yet decided on all of my goals for 2008, so those will come in a later post.

Labels: editing, freelancing, goals, holidays, my horse Panama, NaNoWriMo 2006, novel writing, plain ol' fun, publishing

Days like this one make me marvel anew at what funny creatures horses are. They all have such distinct personalities, and as I get to know Panama better, I've found that his personality is especially cute. Here are some of the things he does that I love:

* The deep nicker he uses to greet me every day. It's surprising, considering what a little horse he is, but Panama has a very deep nicker — maybe because he was left a stallion until he was two. He always greets me when I arrive, and sometimes he nickers to get my attention or when I give him hay before I leave.

* The way he follows me sometimes when I walk. After he'd been in training for a few weeks, Panama suddenly started to follow us sometimes after we finished lunging him. My trainer then taught him to turn and stop when we did, too, but I'm tickled that he was inclined to follow us on his own. Now he does it with very little encouragement, particularly when he is ready to go back to his stall or when he is looking forward to getting turned out.

* His "What next?" look. When my trainer or I ask him to "whoa" when lunging him, Panama always stops with his head high, turns to look at us, and puts his ears forward. It's adorably eager, like he's saying, "Okay, Mom. What next?"

* The way he plays with me in the arena. This is a fairly new phenomenon, but the last few times I've turned Panama out into the arena, I've noticed that he seems eager to play with me. I chase him a bit, sometimes jumping toward him suddenly when he's running past, or dodging him as he runs by. He often responds by bucking (which is how I got kicked) or changing directions abruptly. If you have ever seen horses play together, imagine that without the physical contact, and you've got a pretty good idea of how Panama and I play together.

* His "I want a treat" head bob. Part of our daily grooming session is the occasional treat. I don't like to give him too many, as I don't want him to get mouthy, so the treats make grooming time special. When he knows he's about to get a treat, he turns his head to watch me dig the treat out of my pocket. Because he's tied up, there's only so far he can turn his head, which results in a gentle bobbing as he pulls against the ties.

He's doing it a little here, because he's trying to figure out what I'm doing — see how his head is tilted a little sideways?



Isn't he adorable?

Labels: my horse Panama

I've decided that I need to start telling clients that I only work part-time hours: I put in an average of four billable hours every day, with another couple of hours spent managing client email, blogging, and networking.

This is actually a fairly new phenomenon for me. I used to put in about six billable hours a day (more if I was slammed), but at least two or three more hours were spent on email, job boards, and other forms of marketing.

All of that changed when we moved Panama out here. I head out to the stables in the morning, and generally stay there for anywhere from one to three hours, depending on how much I have to do that day. Most of the time now I don't get to work until at least noonish.

Sometimes it's frustrating to get home, only to realize that I only have a few hours to work before Michael comes home. Often I end up working in the evening to make up some time. But I don't mind it at all — rather, I am grateful to have a job where I have the flexibility to change my schedule as needed.

However, many of my clients — particularly my newer clients — don't understand why I'm not available in the morning. I'm not sure why I haven't had to deal with this problem before, since until earlier this year I was rarely up before 11:00 am — the difference being that I usually worked until 3:00 or 4:00 am.

Needy client syndrome indicates that I will need to be a little more clear about my hours. The dilemma I am facing is that I don't want to label myself a part-time writer, for fear that it will make me sound less serious about my work: The term "part-time" intimates that writing is a hobby, rather than a career.

I think my solution will probably just be to let clients know that I am typically only available in the afternoons and evenings. What do you think?

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama

I rode Panama again today. We did a little steering with the reins today, and moved up to a trot. As promised, my trainer took a few pictures. Here's one:



Panama was quite frisky and affectionate when I arrived. When I turned him out into the arena so that he could run and get rid of his energy, he was acting pretty goofy, running and bucking a lot. I'm pretty sure he's been playing with me lately, just as if I were another horse, and today proves it: He kicked me a little (I'm assuming accidentally) when he bucked.

Honestly, I don't think he did it on purpose. When I chase him in the arena, he will often buck as he runs away. I just happened to be a little closer than usual this time. I saw it coming and turned away, so one of this feet just barely caught me on the butt. It wasn't a hard kick at all, which makes me think he just misjudged how close I was.

After being ridden for an hour, Panama was not nearly so frisky, but since the other Paint's owner was there, we put our horses in the arena together. This time I didn't get pictures, more's the pity, because she put her other horse out with them as well. All three of them ran around the arena together, usually with Panama in the lead, and sometimes in a perfect line — as though they were playing follow-the-leader.

Mornings like this make it really difficult to work afterward — especially when I don't get home from the stables until 2:00 pm!

Labels: my horse Panama

Today was a big day for me and Panama: I rode Panama for the first time ever this morning.

Realistically, about all I did is sit in the saddle and practice walking him and asking him to "whoa." The idea was to get him used to having someone on his back. Next time the trainer comes, we're going to start using the reins to direct him a little more.

The really exciting thing is how well Panama took the whole thing. He hardly seemed fazed when the trainer and I took turns climbing up onto his back, and he was responsive to our commands, even in a dramatically different situation.

It amazes me how different Panama is now. He clearly thrives on the attention and affection, which he didn't get much of before. What is really noticeable is how responsive he is to training: The more challenged he is, the better behaved he also is. I guess it's because he is so smart.

I didn't get any pictures of the big moment, unfortunately, but my trainer said she'll take pictures of me riding Panama during our next session. In the meantime, here is a picture of my handsome little horse wearing his new winter blanket:



That should keep him nice and cozy on cold nights!

Labels: my horse Panama

I had great plans for NaNoWriMo this year. Having "won" NaNoWriMo last year, I decided to aim for 80,000 words this year, rather than the minimum 50,000.

Unfortunately, it was not meant to be. Panama not only creates a demand on my time that I didn't have last year, but he also adds several hundred dollars (minimum) to the income I need to make each month. The end result is that I have more of a need to maintain my income during November, and less time to dedicate to something like novel-writing.

However, I've decided that I'm not going to give up on this novel: I'm going to write it anyway, even if I don't get to it until after NaNoWriMo ends. My plan is to get my current work to the point where I have an hour or two to spend on noveling every day. I probably won't finish the novel in one month, but that's fine. The point is to get it written, whether it takes one month or one year.

I'll let you know when I get started, and keep track of my progress here on my blog!

Labels: my horse Panama, NaNoWriMo 2007

People take things for granted -- it's just human nature. That's why I'm okay with Thanksgiving as a holiday, no matter how politically incorrect it is. I know that there was never any happy little Thanksgiving feast where the pilgrims and the Indians sat down together, held hands, and sang "Kumbaya." For one thing, the much-lauded pilgrims were actually self-righteous, priggish jerkoffs who were responsible for massacring the local natives. By another account, the first Thanksgiving in actuality marked the failure of William Bradford's attempts at a communist community. (I wonder if Joseph McCarthy knew that his "one nation, under God" had its roots in communism?)

But wait, I'm getting sidetracked. I'm not okay with the myth of Thanksgiving, but I am okay with the holiday itself. I think it is good to remind people to appreciate what they have in their lives.

So without further ado, this is what I am thankful for this year:

* A wonderful husband... whom I married in a beautiful 1920s-themed wedding earlier this year

* The career I've always wanted... for which I don't have to dress up, drive in rush hour, or deal with office politics

* A happy, healthy horse... who is learning more every day

* A beautiful home... that we own

* ...And pretty much everything else in our lives. We have wonderful families, pets, and lives. What more can I say?

Labels: family, freelancing, holidays, home sweet home, Michael, miscellaneous, my horse Panama

Friday morning's events also contributed to me not getting my work done.

I went to the stables Friday morning with every intention of only being there a short while before returning home to work. I cleaned Panama's stall, brushed him, and turned him out to run a bit.

Then another of the owners showed up, and we chatted a bit. She only recently brought her horse to the stables, and we share some concerns about the way the place is run.

I've probably mentioned that I clean Panama's stall every day because I don't think the owner cleans it frequently enough. I don't mind cleaning it, really; I would be there anyway, regardless, and it gives Panama time to graze. Also, there is something satisfying and comforting about doing it myself.

However, there is a point where the infrequent cleanings become rather disturbing. On Friday, one of the horses was walking around in nearly six inches of manure, spread across the floor of his stall. Another horse, who likes to poop in the same place every time, had a veritable mountain of manure in his stall.

The real concern came when the other owner and I both decided to give our horses a flake of hay as a treat before we left. We cracked into a bale that had not yet had any hay taken off of it, and found that the inside of quite damp. (The owner stores some of his hay outside under tarps, which you are not supposed to do.) Sure enough, there was mold in the hay, too. Panama found it, but thankfully tossed it aside and didn't eat it; however, I worry that he would have gone back later and eaten it when he got hungry again between meals, had I not noticed.

Later that afternoon, yet another one of the owners sent me a text message stating that she had found mold, too.

When my main issue with the stables was the infrequent stall cleaning, I wasn't worried about it so much; the price is cheap enough to make cleaning his stall myself worthwhile. However, I won't keep Panama where his safety and health is a concern, no matter how cheap the price. I'll see how the winter goes, but if the problems continue I will find Panama a new home in the spring.

Unfortunately, I have not yet gotten good at working when I have something troubling on my mind. When I am upset, I just can't focus on work, so I didn't get much done on Friday, either.

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama

As promised, here is Thursday's stable story.

Thursday morning, Panama and I had an appointment with his trainer. It was our only session for the week, because I'd been too busy earlier in the week. Unfortunately, I had not worked with Panama all week, either; because it was always dark when I visited, poor Panama hadn't even been turned out to run since Sunday. (Usually, I turn him out into the arena every day and chase him around, so that he gets enough exercise and gets rid of any extra energy.)

The effects of being cooped up for three days straight was quite clear from the beginning. Panama was restless and downright ornery. When he was first set loose in the arena, Panama cantered and bucked more than I've ever seen him do when I turn him out. And even after running hard for several minutes, he was a royal pain in the butt for the trainer. When she had me work him (she's teaching me, too), he kept getting himself all wrapped up in the lines; once he got himself tangled up so badly that he panicked and reared.

Well, after a morning like that, it's hard to settle down enough to actually work. It also didn't help that I had a lot to do after not being there much for three days. Although I'd been picking out his stall each evening, the light in the barn is dim, and it turned out I wasn't doing a very good job of it. It took much longer on Thursday to clean out his stall than it usually does.

On top of all of that, I also had a few errands to run. As a result, by the time I got home my day was more than half over, and anyway all I wanted to do was talk about my horse.

Lessons learned: Don't try to skimp on visits to the stables when I'm busy. It just creates a need for a longer visit when I return to my regular schedule, compliments of Panama's cabin fever — and my withdrawals.

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama

Panama's old halter was getting a touch too snug, so I got him a new one. If you know anything about horses, this will give you an idea of how small Panama is: The new halter is a cob size halter.

While I was at the tack store, I decided to treat Panama (well, okay, treat me) to a new lead rope, as well.



Yup. We're color coordinating now.

Labels: my horse Panama

Anyone who freelances knows how it can be a "feast or famine" kind of situation. Some months you are booked beyond belief, and the money just keeps rolling in. Other months you feel like it's all you can do just to scratch by.

Unfortunately, I'm going through a famine type of time right now, down from the feasting I did just a couple of months ago. I worked so much over the summer that I got rather burnt out, and I still thinking I'm working a little slower than usual from that. I haven't really gotten around to finishing my website updates or looking for new work, so I've been dependent on my regulars. And that's just not enough.

All the time that I've been spending with Panama is also coming back to bite me in the a$$. It took me a while to figure out how to juggle stable time and work time. Although there are still some days where I don't get much work done, I'm getting better about it. Unfortunately, in the meantime the well has run dry.

Honestly, though, there's nothing like feeling poor to make you work harder. I worked all day today, only spent 45 minutes at the stables, and plan to work a few more hours this evening. The rest of the week will most likely be similar, but hopefully after that I'll be in a comfortable spot again.

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama

Yesterday, I blogged about what I would write with an extra hour each day — a meme inspired by Daylight Savings Time.

Then clocks rolled back, giving us our extra hour. Mine was not spent on writing. Instead, it was diddled away rescuing Michael, and making not one but two trips to the stables as a result.

Michael went on a bike ride this afternoon, since the weather was so perfect: a slightly breezy day with temperatures in the low 70s. I was planning on celebrating the warm weather my own way: by bathing Panama.

Unfortunately, Michael got two flats while on his bike ride. When he got the first, he happened to be near a sports store, so he had them fix his tire. I ended up having to rescue him after all, though, when he got a second flat shortly after leaving the store.

I was at the stables already when I got the call, so I had to put Panama back in his stall and leave without having done anything with him yet. After rescuing Michael, he came with me back up to the stables. During the second visit, I did my usual routine: turning Panama out into the pasture to graze while I cleaned his stall, grooming him and picking out his feet, and turning him out into the arena to get him to run around a bit.

Although it was getting late at this point, and I had used up my extra hour (and then some!), I decided to go ahead and bathe Panama after all.











Due to my bungled afternoon and some pre-existing evening plans, I didn't get the work done this weekend that I had planned. Tomorrow I will need to do some serious catching up!

Labels: freelancing, Michael, my horse Panama

Panama tolerates a saddle now. He lunges with it on, and we're getting him accustomed to jingling noises by fastening keys to it while he lunges.





Doesn't he look so grown up? I'm so proud.

Labels: my horse Panama

About a week ago, I received my first affiliate program payment: a gift certificate from Amazon.com, which I've earned through referral sales on this blog and Livre du Jour.

Oddly enough, Amazon.com carries lots of horse stuff, from brushes and treats to clothing and accessories, so I put my gift certificate toward a brand-new winter blanket for Panama. I'm not going to be too overeager about the blanketing, because I want him to grow a decent winter coat (the more you blanket them, the thinner their coat). However, I do want to blanket him when it gets bitterly cold, such as below 20 or 25 degrees.

I also got a pair of cheap riding gloves for me — I'm a big baby about the cold, and I won't be able to stand my hands getting chilled when I work with him in the winter!

There's lots of other horse goodies on Amazon.com, so I'm sure I'll be back before too long. I swear, I have more fun shopping for Panama than I do shopping for myself!

Labels: affiliate programs, my horse Panama

My morning was hijacked by an impromptu play date for Panama.

There is another Paint at our barn that looks very much like Panama. Lakota is about a year older, and has a similar history as Panama: rescued as a baby, trust issues with his feet due to repeated leg injuries, a little bit of wildness due to a late gelding, and in need of training.

Although Lakota is supposedly quite wild, I have always felt that he and Panama got along well. Lakota's run is on the edge of the pasture where I always let Panama graze, and early on they visited with each other a lot. However, Lakota's owner usually doesn't let him out with other horses, because he has a tendency to show off and get hurt.

This morning when I arrived at the stables, she just happened to be there. We both spent all morning at the barn, so when she put Lakota in the arena, she asked if I wanted to put Panama in there with him. It went great! The horses greeted each other, with Panama signalling his subordinance by licking and chewing. Then they both went right back to grazing.

In fact, they were so comfortable around each other that we had to break out a lunge whip and chase them a bit to get them to run together. Once we got them moving, though, I got a number of really good pictures.

Don't they look almost like brothers? (Panama is the one with more white on his face.)

Labels: my horse Panama

Panama effectively hijacked my day, and I spent about four hours at the barn instead of doing the work I'd planned for this afternoon.

While Michael and I were grooming Panama, we realized that he was acting rather differently than usual: That is to say, he was standing still instead of dancing around, and seemed to have no interest in treats (very unusual for him!). His nostrils also looked a little snotty.

Then I turned Panama out into the arena and chased him around a bit, but he didn't seem to want to canter. When he stopped running, he looked at me at such an angle that I realized his cheek was swollen. We immediately pulled him out of the arena, and I began making phone calls.





I was concerned about two major possibilities: strangles, which is a horse disease that can result in blocked airways, and that he had ingested lime, which the stable owner had put down (uncovered!) for the first time. It didn't help that Panama was clearly feeling very needy — he stuck as close to me as possible, and showed no interest in grazing (also very unusual).

I got a hold of the vet and he came out. It turns out Panama must have banged his face recently and badly; I'll have to have the vet drain the abcess in a few days, but for right now all he could do was to give him a shot and leave me with some painkiller/anti-inflammatory medicine. Still, better safe than sorry!

Once Panama had the shot, he started feeling better within 10 or 15 minutes. I could tell because he started grazing and stopped following me around with sad eyes. I cleaned his stall, letting him graze a while, and then did a little groundwork with him.

By the time I finally left, I had been there for about four hours, and the entire afternoon was gone. I'm not sorry, though — I'm glad I was there and was able to call in the vet to make Panama more comfortable. It was also rather heartwarming that when he was feeling crappy, he wanted nothing more than to feel close to me: It proves that I really have gained his trust in a major way.

Labels: my horse Panama

Panama had his first training session this morning!

I arrived at the stables about 45 minutes early. I'd wanted to give him a bath — he was caked with mud when I arrived yesterday evening, but I hadn't had a chance to get it off — but I ran out of time, so instead I just curried and brushed him twice. I also made sure that I mucked out his stall before the training session, guessing (correctly) that I wouldn't want to afterward.

I was very pleased with both the trainer and the amount of progress she made. She picked up all four of Panama's feet, and I immediately noticed that she had a better way of doing it than I did — a way that enabled her to hold onto his foot better, and still have one hand free to pick it out as necessary. In fact, we picked out all four feet — she did two while I watched, since it's been about 15 years since I've picked out a horse's foot, and then I did the other two.

She also did a few other things — making him walk and halt, tying him and having him stand while she groomed him just a little bit, etc. Then she took him out into the pasture and showed me how to lunge him.

For the most part, Panama behaved decently. The trainer commented that he is smart, because he caught on to things fairly quickly. However, there came a point where he'd had enough, and she had to deal with his stubborn streak.

Overall, though, I think it went quite well. The trainer did say that from what I had told her, she expected him to be much worse than he was. Others have said that, too, or shown surprise that he's not mean. That always amuses me, because I never describe him as mean — just as untrained and a little skittish from being a baby and a rescue.

However, I have to say that I think Panama has already come a long ways since he first arrived about a month ago. He has clearly come to trust me almost completely, and is much less spooky and wild than he was when he arrived. With the added help of a trainer, I think he'll be quite well-behaved in no time.

Labels: my horse Panama

On Sunday, I put the bareback pad on Panama again and let him graze with it on for a while. The feel of it when he walked had him a little antsy at first, but he got used to it quickly. We took the opportunity to get a bunch of pictures, a few of which I'll post here.

Yet another picture of Panama grazing:



Hey Panama — say cheese!



Me leading Panama — a good picture because it shows his height. The top of his shoulders comes right about to my collarbone, so he's still fairly small. At two, he's not done growing yet, but I don't think he'll get more than another few inches.

Labels: my horse Panama

Time for another post about Panama!

Today was a big day as far as training milestones go. These are the things I am excited about right now:

1) Panama is apparently no longer spooked by tarps blowing in the wind.

I don't know if I ever mentioned it on my blog, but a couple of weeks ago Panama spooked a bit when I led him by a tarp fluttering in the wind. At the time, I took the opportunity to "sack him out" a little: I led him up to the tarp, let him sniff it, then grabbed it and shook it to make it rustle. He reared back just a bit, startled, but I encouraged him to sniff it again and he did. I kept that up until he no longer showed any fear of the tarp.

Apparently the lesson has not been forgotten. When we arrived at the stables today, the other horses had been turned out into both of the pastures I usually use for Panama. The next best choice was the pasture with the tarp. Because it was windy, I wanted to make sure he wouldn't spook, so I led him up to the tarp and shook it. He was reluctant to walk too close, but shaking the tarp didn't seem to faze him.

2) I was able to pick up both his rear feet, and I got about halfway through picking out his front feet.

I've been working with Panama almost every day about picking up his feet, and for about a week I've been attempting to pick out his front feet. Usually I only get one or two strokes with the pick before he's had enough, but today he let me get about halfway done on one front foot, and almost that far on the other.

Picking up his rear feet has been a little more touch-and-go, due to major trust issues stemming from the trailer accident he was in as a yearling. In the past week, he has gotten much better about it, however. Today when I tried to pick up his right rear foot, he kicked out a little bit, but I didn't let go or put his foot down until he stopped trying to get loose (which only took a second or two).

Because he is more sensitive about his left rear foot, I expected him to kick out worse on that side — but he surprised me by quietly lifting his foot when I asked for it. This is very promising, as it indicates that he may be getting over his trust issues with his rear feet.

3) Panama allowed me to put a bareback pad on his back and cinch it under his belly.

This is a huge step, and one I am extraordinarily pleased about. I've been putting a towel over Panama's back every day for about a week now, and he's been tolerating it without any problems. We'd also gotten a used bareback pad from my favorite tack store, and I decided to try putting that on Panama this afternoon.

First, I put the towel over his back as usual. Then I set the bareback pad over it, kind of like you would put a saddle on top of a saddle blanket. Panama was eating and hardly seemed to notice, so I decided to try cinching it up. He was completely unfazed when I drew the strap under his belly. When I started to cinch it tighter, he panicked briefly and pranced to the side, but that was it. I took the towel off, put the bareback pad on alone, and cinched it tight — and he just kept right on eating.



Panama's acceptance of the bareback pad made me really want to ride him. This is the first time I have felt such a strong urge to do so — I actually much prefer groundwork to riding, as sitting on a horse's back is so impersonal. However, I think the relationship and trust Panama and I are developing makes riding a much more appealing option.

It seems that every visit to the stables is better than the last. Panama's ground manners are improving by leaps and bounds, and I am beginning to think that training him may not be as difficult as I originally anticipated. Honestly, I think his impatience and stubbornness will be the most difficult challenges to overcome, but who am I to complain — after all, it was his display of spirit that drew me to him the very first time we met.

Labels: my horse Panama

Panama had his first bath yesterday. Considering that he had come to associate getting a bath with having his leg wound cleaned, he tolerated it extraordinarily well.

Of course, being there alone I couldn't take pictures of the actual bath process, but I wish I could have gotten pictures of the bewildered look on his face.

As I said, though, he tolerated it pretty well. I was able to wash his body and neck on both sides, a little bit of both front legs, and touch the sponge a few times to his injured leg. (Speaking of which, he also let me touch his wound the other day, which is now healing up quite nicely.)

I did get some pictures of Panama after giving him the bath and drying him off somewhat. I turned him loose in the pasture, and guess what? He went right back to grazing, just like nothing had even happened!



I like this picture because it shows his tail flying. He was in the middle of flicking it around, probably to get rid of some pesky flies. Also, you can see how smoothly his mane lies with the conditioner in it.



This picture shows how his mane continues his coloring. I really like how his mane changes to white at the exact place his body does. When his mane is combed and his head is down like this, it creates a lovely seamless transition from body to mane.



Let me tell you something about owning a horse. They eat a lot. So as a result, I have a gazillion pictures of Panama grazing, and very few of him doing anything else. And the times when I got his picture when he wasn't grazing, he was making it quite clear that he rather would be.

At any rate, I'm going to have Michael start taking more pictures of me and Panama on the weekends, so that with any luck I can get a few nice pictures with my beautiful boy.

Labels: my horse Panama

Today has been d*mned disappointing. Although I did succeed in improving my work time (lately I've been struggling with working slowly and being distracted easily), my small victory has been overshadowed by everything else that happened today.

1) The power went out. From about 11:30am until 1:30pm, the power was out at my house. Although my laptop battery was fully charged, allowing me to continue working, I had to do so without Internet access. Thankfully, I had already done enough research to continue working on my current project.

2) I forgot to feed the dogs. You know how when a bunch of things all go wrong at once, how a little thing can suddenly seem a much bigger deal than it actually is? This is one of those things.

3) I didn't get to the stables to see Panama. This also supports the feeling that I've been a bad mommy today. In the month since Panama first arrived, I've never skipped my daily visit -- until today. Unfortunately, I had a lot of work and I was running short on time. Of course, now I'm fretting about missing a day of cleaning his stall, wondering whether he has enough water, and imagining all of the terrible things that could be happening right now that I won't know about because I'm not there.

4) I haven't paid Panama's stable rent yet. Three strikes and you're a bad mommy! I've been behind on work the last couple of days, and with the beginning of the month and all that means being behind on bills, too. And no, reminding myself that I'll pay it tomorrow doesn't help at all.

5) I'm behind on work. The fact that I was able to work a little faster today notwithstanding, I am sadly behind on my work. I'll be working the rest of the evening for sure.

Now that I've griped about it, I'd better get back to work. With any luck, I can catch up by tomorrow evening.

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama, the menagerie, under the weather

Signups for NaNoWriMo 2007 start Monday, October 1st!

For those of you who don't know yet, NaNoWriMo is National Novel Writing Month. The challenge is to write a novel, or at least 50,000 words of one, all in one month: November. Unfortunately, you can't start on the novel until November 1st.

You can, however, outline, write character sketches, etc. Also, you can use an old project, just as long as you throw out -- and don't reference -- everything you'd written previously. The idea is to write 50,000 words (or more) in a single month, so no cheating!

I participated in NaNoWriMo in 2006. You can see all of last year's posts here. (Note: This link is different than it was, as I decided to differentiate in my labels between "NaNoWriMo 2006" and "NaNoWriMo 2007.")

I intend to participate in NaNo again this year. The only trick is that this year I have added obligations: Last year, I only had to maintain my regular freelance workload, but this year I also have the daily obligation of visiting and working with my horse. Since writing freelance and fiction monopolized my time last year, I'm not sure how it's going to work to throw another variable into the equation. However, I'm very excited about this year's novel, so I'm sure I'll make it work somehow!

Labels: freelancing, my horse Panama, NaNoWriMo 2006, NaNoWriMo 2007, novel writing

I just wrote a little post about my daily visits with Panama. Here are some pictures Michael took today. I'm going to have him start doing regular "photo shoots" with me and Panama, so stay tuned for more next weekend!

Labels: Michael, my horse Panama

My blog is beginning to me almost as much about my horse as about writing. I guess that's fair, though, since the same sort of shift has been going on in my life since Panama arrived in town.

I visit with Panama for at least an hour every day. Up until this past week, my visits always occurred mid-morning. This past week, I visited only in the evenings. However, I don't like that as much — not only is Panama kind of irritable around dinner time, but there is also more chaos, as the owner and the help feed the horses, muck out the stalls, etc. This week I intend to go back to visiting in the morning.

Anyway, my visits have fallen into something of a routine. Every visit, I do these things, though not always in this order:

1) Groom Panama. Currying and brushing Panama every day keeps him cleaner and prevents his mane and tail from tangling as badly. I'm also hoping it will eventually become a bonding thing...once I figure out how to stop tickling him with the curry, that is!

2) Pick up Panama's feet. This is an important part of my daily visits. Panama has trust issues with his feet, particularly his hind ones, thanks to the trailer accident that injured his ankles as a yearling. The daily attention to his feet is helping, though — he now lets me pick up his front feet with little or no protest, and has even let me pick up his back feet a few times (though that's a touchier issue).

3) Turn Panama out. Although the stables are supposed to be full care, the horses don't get turned out as frequently as I'd like. In other words, if I didn't turn Panama out for a little bit every day, weekends would be his only chance to get out of his stall.

4) Muck out Panama's stall. Again, although the stables are full care, this doesn't get done as often as I'd like — particularly since Panama is not letting me pick the manure out of his feet yet. Mucking out a stall is actually not as hard or as time consuming as you might think — though after a few more months of this, I should be in great shape!

5) Work with Panama on basic training and ground manners. I think I mentioned in a previous post that Panama is very impatient. I am working with him on this — making him follow my lead without crowding, standing still while being groomed, etc. — as well as doing some basic training. For example, I am starting to work with him on simple commands such as "walk," "halt," and "over." I've also gotten to tolerate a towel on his back — in fact, by the second day of working with him with the towel, he's comfortable enough with it that he doesn't spook even if I wave it in front of his face or shake it out over his back. He is one smart horse, that is for sure!

Although Panama is stubborn and can be fiery at times, the daily visits are paying off: He is starting to bond with me more deeply. In the last week, he has started nickering to me every day when I arrive. I can't even begin to tell you how satisfying that is!

Labels: my horse Panama

Halo 3 came out Tuesday, as you might know if you are the kind of person who follows video game news.

Personally, I'm not exactly sure how it is that my soul mate likes video games. Or, more specifically, how it is that I could come to be married to someone who would preorder a video game.

I'm not a video game player, and I never have been. We didn't even have a Nintendo when I was growing up, and although I can remember pleading for one a few times throughout my childhood, for the most part we didn't feel deprived. I spent most of my free time with my nose in a book, anyway.

Michael, on the other hand, is very much a fan of video games. And as a result, our house has been filled with the sounds of Halo 3 the last couple evenings.

On the bright side, although I don't much care for the sound (Michael likes it movie theater-loud), this has given me time to do things that I want or need to get done. For instance, I can put in some extra work hours without feeling guilty for ignoring Michael, or go up to the stables to visit Panama. This is actually a good thing, because the last couple of weeks I have found myself working at the speed of molasses, and the daily visits to the stables (which I will not give up) don't help at all.

Labels: freelancing, Michael, my horse Panama

I had a run-in with Panama this weekend — quite literally, actually!

On Saturday, as I was leading him past a few of the other horses' runs and into one of the pastures, a particularly nasty-tempered mare tried to bite him. I assume it was her attempt to put the new young horse in his place, but it scared both me and Panama — she snapped her jaw shut so quickly, and right next to his face, that we could hear her teeth slam together! Panama was understandably impatient to get past her, but I stopped to scare her off from the fence by pushing her shoulders and yelling at her.

Thirty minutes or so later, Michael and I brought Panama back from the pasture. I was leading Panama past the mare when she leaned over the fence and started trying to nip at him again. I leaned across to scare her off again, but at that same moment, Panama decided he needed to get out of her reach. Unfortunately, I was in the way; as he swung his head around and lunged forward, his nose hit my cheekbone with the force of a battering ram.

I dimly remember feeling the impact, but I don't remember falling. Next thing I knew, I was sitting on my butt in the dirt, and Panama was leaning down to sniff me apologetically.

Luckily, Michael was there, so he was able to lead Panama back into the yard while I regained my equilibrium. I wondered if my face would turn black-and-blue from the impact, but other than a little stiffness and soreness, nothing interesting came of it.

Michael told me that it was too bad I didn't stay on my feet, because if I had he would have put me in the (boxing) ring.

I'm actually glad to have sustained my first (albeit minor) injury from working with my horse. Although the impact stunned me more than I'd like to admit, I at least know what to expect now. Oddly enough, I think this has made me worry less about getting injured around Panama, rather than more.

Labels: Michael, my horse Panama

Being a "real" horse owner is quickly changing my life.

Although we rescued Panama in June of 2006, it was not until last Thursday that I felt I became a "real" horse owner. Although I love working with Panama, I am also finding that owning a horse carries with it certain necessary compromises.

These are the changes I am experiencing so far:

1) I have less time for writing. This was inevitable. I am trying to settle into a schedule, but still, visiting and working with Panama takes up a lot of time. This means that...

2) I am working more in the evenings. After my Big Project ended, I was supposed to have to work overtime anymore. Unfortunately, I wasn't taking into account the amount of time I would be spending on Panama once he arrived. I'm having to work a lot of evenings in order to make up for the work time I missed out on during the day. However, the real surprise is that...

3) I don't care about #1 and #2. Obviously, I still need to dedicate a certain amount of time to work, at least if I am going to continue to be able to afford my horse. I'd also like to be able to minimize the amount of catch-up I have to do when Michael is home. However, I am so happy about Panama being here that I am glad to make these sacrifices in order to spend time with him.

4) I am more active. I think one of the biggest challenges work-at-home writers face is how to get enough exercise. At least, for me that is true: Sometimes I sit at my desk for hours at a time without getting up. It's not good for me, of course, but it's a difficult habit to break when the only reason you have for getting up is going into the kitchen to get food. Which brings me to #5...

5) I eat less. It seems to me that when I am home, working twenty feet away from the fridge, I eat more frequently. Sometimes I seem to get hungry faster; other times I think I just need the excuse to get up and move around, and doing laundry doesn't do anything to relieve restlessness.

6) I feel more fulfilled. I love my work, I really do. But there is something so fulfilling about spending an hour at the stables every morning -- something my work can't give me. I think what it comes down to is that being busy doing lots of different things is very satisfying, while being busy doing the same thing all day long very quickly becomes tedious. Working with Panama gets me moving and changes up my day a little bit, and that seems to make all the difference.

Labels: my horse Panama

Panama is doing well in his new home. He's still a little jittery, but he is not panicked, so I have started working with him a little bit.

Over the weekend, I took Panama out of his stall and walked him around a little. This picture was taken on Saturday in the round pen (which is evidently never used, judging by the height of the weeds in there).



Yesterday I took Panama into the arena and set him loose. After giving him a chance to get used to his new surroundings, I worked with him a little bit using a mixture of ground training techniques. By combining training suggestions from Meredith Manor and Monty Roberts, I started teaching Panama not only to focus his attention on me and respect my presence a little more, but also to follow me around in the arena. All in all, it was a good start.

I was a little worried about how I was going to get his halter on him by myself, as so far I have needed treats and an extra pair of hands every time. This morning was my first time doing it all by myself. I had an inspiration, though: Instead of holding the halter with one hand and the treat with the other, or trying to draw the halter over his nose before he could pull away, I stood quietly with the halter held out in both hands and my head down, using much the same body language as I had used in the arena the previous day. Panama took a long time sniffing the halter, and after a couple of moments I drew it up over his nose -- and he didn't try to pull away at all. It was a huge success for both of us: me because I am learning how to communicate with him better, and Panama because he is learning to accept certain expectations of domestic horses.

Labels: my horse Panama

Panama arrived yesterday at about 3:30pm. Despite his rough time loading up the night before, he unloaded pretty easily. He didn't want to step on the ramp, so he balked in the doorway of the trailer, and the driver had to pull on him pretty hard in order to get him to walk down it. However, once he was down he was as gentle as a lamb (which is good, because I think the stable owner was starting to think I had a crazy-aggressive horse).

All in all, everything went pretty well. The only major setback was that Panama had never been inside a stable before, so he refused to go in the normal way; the stable owner had to lead him in through the gate on his run. After the owner left me and Panama alone, I was able to get him inside the stall using a little coaxing -- and a lot of carrots.



Panama's wound does look pretty nasty. You can probably see it in the picture above; I'll post a picture of the other side below, too. Because he was wrapped up in the fence, the cut spirals all the way around his leg.



On top of it all, he now has an incision on his nose, too -- he went through a fence the other night when the in-laws were trying to load him up, in an attempt to return to the pasture. I don't think you can quite see it in this picture, but it's under the nose strap of his halter.



I spent several hours total at the stables yesterday. I was there for about an hour after Panama arrived; after picking up Michael from work (we're down to one car right now) and eating dinner, both Michael and I went back and stayed for another hour or two. I brushed him, and the poor thing was so tired from his long trailer ride that he just stood there in a stupor afterward -- I had to lead him by his halter to get him to move again.

This morning after taking Michael to work, I went back and visited with Panama. He whinnied as I was walking up, and seemed quite pleased to see me (he was out in the run, so I called to him). I brushed him again, although this time he was a little edgy -- the birds that hang out in the rafters make him nervous, as he is not used to that at all.

I went to the stables a total of two times this morning, with a few errands (buying horse treats, antiseptic spray, and a toolbox to keep his brushes and stuff in) in between. Later this evening, Michael and I are going to go up there together to wash and treat the cuts on his leg and nose. With Panama being a little nervous still, I want someone's help the first time I do this!

I didn't really get anything done yesterday, and so far half the day has gone without me accomplishing anything. I think it is probably going to take a week or so to settle into a routine; it'll be especially difficult until Panama's wounds heal, as they need attention twice a day right now. Once that is no longer the case, my plan is to go to the stable first thing every morning, in order to minimize the interruption to my day.

What makes me sad -- and what I am determined not to be like -- is how seldom some of the horses' owners come. The horse in the stall next to Panama has his lead rope and halter on a wooden shelf, and there are cobwebs all over it -- that is how infrequently his owners come to visit! There are several saddles in the shed, and all of them are coated with several millimeters of undisturbed dust.



I can't imagine not wanting to spend time with Panama, and I hope I never get to the point where I just don't care about my horse anymore.

Labels: my horse Panama